Choosing to Believe

"The church suffers from a strength-sapping case of unbelief; but we've had the ailment so long, we don't know how good authentic belief feels.  The healthiest Christians you will ever meet are not those with perfect physiques but those who take a daily dose of God's Word and choose to believe it works!"  Beth Moore, Breaking Free, p. 211.  Have you ever thought or said this, 'I have such trouble really believing and accepting how much God loves me.'  Beth Moore asks us to consider that God's answer to this issue in our lives in the sin of unbelief.

I see it for myself.  I have continually chosen to believe that I am unworthy of the kind of love that God says He has for me, lavish, unfailing, etc... Certain that I needed to be different, better, do something more in order to earn the love that He gives.  Oh I have played the 'churchy' game many times and I would not have come right out and called it unbelief or sin...as I have mentioned before I often call my sin by softer terms.  Basically excusing myself rather than facing my sin for what it is.  God forgive me for excusing my self and for not believing Your Word when You tell me You love me with an everlasting love (Jer. 31:3).  Help me to not play with my sin, to pretend it isn't there or excuse it and call it something else all together.  Open the eyes of my understanding, of my heart, (Eph. 1:18) that I can see You at work.   "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief." Mark 9:24.  Father, forgive me for so often believing what I feel rather than the truth of Your Word.  Transform me.  Please do not allow me to sit in this sin any longer, but each time it raises it's head may I recognize it and confess it to You.  You have graciously and faithfully revealed this to me time and time again may it stick this time...may I live the truth of Your Word!

Romans 8:37-39  "No, in all these things we are more than victorious through Him who loved us.  For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor poses, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will have the power to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord!"  Do you see it???  We are victorious through God who loves us in Christ Jesus!  His love has nothing to do with me and everything to do with HIM!!!!  Praise God!

Lastly, something by Oswald Chambers.  "If you are going to be used by God, He will take you through a number of experiences that are not meant for you personally at all.  They are designed to make you useful in His hands, and to enable you to understand what takes place in the lives of others." My Utmost For His Highest, November 5.  This blew me away this morning.  The reading was on 1 Peter 4:13 '...but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ's sufferings.'  I mean do I or do I not want to be 'useful in His hands'?  Yes, I do.  But wait a minute, suffering?  I run from suffering.  I mean give me air conditioning, no wait the heat, no what I want at the moment, I want it!  I mean that is suffering isn't it?  To not have what I want?  (Ok, just being a smart aleck there for a minute!)  Seriously, I avoid suffering and the Scriptures about it at almost any cost and yet the Word says, 'those who suffer according to God's will should, in doing good, entrust themselves to a faithful Creator.'  1 Peter 4:19.  "But we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts throughout the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us." Romans 5:3-5

Sometimes our suffering is caused by our sin, like my choice to live with the certainty that I am not good enough for God to love, not really believing that He loves me deep within.  Sometimes it is simply because we live in a fallen world.  But always, God uses our experiences for His glory and for His purposes if we submit to Him.  Romans 8:28, 'We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God; those who are called according to His purpose.'  Sometimes His purposes for us include suffering injustice, gossip, mean-spiritedness, hurt, anger, abandonment, neglect, etc... The  fact of the matter is I do not really know what true suffering is, but what little I have experienced I want God to be able to use for His glory, for His purposes.  I want to grow in belief and be used for His glory.  Yes, Lord, make it so.  To trust that His Word is TRUTH!!!