Abundance of peace

In this Journey His Way, I am being required to "Be still and know that He is God, that He will be exalted, Psalm 46:10."  I am being required to apply Lamentations 3:26, "It is good that one should hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD."  Throughout this journey, in particular since August 2013, I have learned just how poorly I am at waiting and specifically waiting quietly.  ;-/  As of yet I have not learned what I need to because this is what my Father is still requiring of me.

In looking back at a verse that Mark and I have held dear for our entire 23 years of marriage, Psalm 37:4, I have realized the need to look once again at this verse and the passage in which it is contained.

Psalm 37:3-7a, 11 
3)  Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on HIs faithfulness.
4)  Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.
5)  Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass.  
6)  He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday.
7)  Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him...

11) But the meek shall inherit the earth, and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.  

So I have read this passage many times as I am sure you have and often I focus on verse 4 because that is what I want, the desires of my heart.  I mean I am just being honest.  I would attempt to or strive to delight in the Lord but my main goal was to get what I want.  How immature and man, was I missing out on a lot the Lord has for me.

Look at what is required of me besides just delighting in the Lord (who provides even the ability for me to be able to delight in Him, by the way).  Trust - to have confidence in.  First and foremost I must trust or have confidence in the LORD, that He is Who He says He is, that He is good, that He is faithful, that He is forgiving, that He extends grace to me, mercy too and on and on.  Then out of that trust comes a willingness, a want to, do good.  Not just do anything that comes along but to do good. And to me to do good means that I am doing what God has called me to do which is often not what I would expect.

In my case right now (and all the time really), that is to wait patiently and quietly for God to do what He wants.  Oh this is so hard for me, because my whole life has been built upon doing not on being.  I have talked about being often enough, if you know me at all, but I have yet to learn how to really be...as in be still and know that He is God and be quiet while He works.  I mean I am a good helper, He has made me that way!!!  But the fact is He does not want or need my help, He wants me to be obedient, period and sometimes that means He allows me to help, but only at His lead is it truly good.   So hard, I mean I am obedient at times and then all of the sudden I find myself trying to help in my own strength, you know how it is...trying to give someone I love advice over what they should do because after all I can see it clearly - bosh!!!!  I can't even see clearly what I am supposed to do much less what someone else is to do!  It often seems I would just rather 'help' them than do what I am supposed to.

Verse 3b says "dwell in the land and feed on His faithfulness".  That sounds lovely doesn't it?  Why do I spend so much time fighting Him then?  Because I want my own way; however when I deliberately chose to trust in Him and do good, recognize (dwell) in His presence and feed on who He is then each of these actions become easier to choose and I receive the desires of my heart - which through this process have become the desires He would have for my heart!  I do not know about you but I am WAY thankful that this process is necessary because too often I really do not 'want' the desires of my heart - my heart is sinful and what I want is often not best!  Thank God that He protects me from myself in His Grace.  Also the desires of our heart are not really things but more of Him in our lives!

More... verse 5 says "Commit your way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass."  Commitment takes ongoing action as does trust, again hanging out with Him, in His Word, gives us the ability to do our part.  He always does His!  He shall bring it to pass - a life of trust, commitment, fulfilled desires, the ability to feed on His faithfulness, knowing that He will handle our enemy and allow us to shine for Him.  We are limited in this because we live in a fallen, sinful world, but we can know it in part and more than we realize.

Here we go... "Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him."  In his commentary on Psalm 37, Warren Wiersbe says,  "The verb rest, means 'be silent, be still.'  It describes calm surrender to the Lord (Psalm 62:5, My soul wait silently for God alone, for my expectation is from Him.)  Unless we learn to wait silently before God, we will never experience His peace."  I SO WANT THIS PEACE!!!  I find that I have it momentarily, but I am much better at 'helping and talking' than I am at waiting and resting!  I am growing and for that I am thankful, but the word patience is also a pretty big issue =}  I am very impatient.  I just am, no excuse, but a great opportunity for God to work!

Lastly, look at verse 11, "But the meek shall inherit the earth, and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace."  Wiersbe also says "'Meekness' does not mean 'weakness.'  It means force under the control of faith."  Defined meek means:  poor, humble, afflicted, lowly.  I think it means being aware that I am and have nothing without Christ, that I am a sinner that is saved by grace and I need to remember this when I want to fight for myself instead of wait for the Lord to fight for me and give me the abundance of peace that I so want.  At least I say that I so want it, but in all honesty I must want to fight my own battles more and therefore abundant peace is often missing from the dailyness of my life!

Well, LORD, as my LORD AND MASTER, MY SAVIOR, I need You to teach me to trust You, really, and what to do good really looks like, how to dwell in You and feed on Your faithfulness.  I want to find delight in You and have my desires be Your very own.  Help me to continually commit my ways to You and again trust You.  To know that You are at work for my good and that You will defend me, cause me to be Your light and exhibit Your righteousness.  Father God, may I truly learn to rest in You more often than I rely on myself.  Remind me to wait and in so doing help me to be obedient to wait patiently.  "Set a guard, O LORD, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips," Psalm 141:3.   Especially in my home, Lord.  May I stop being so arrogant to think that I know what is best for others and may I learn to look to You for myself and be obedient.  Forgive me for being self-righteous and full of pride, for being impatient and trying to control the timing of events myself instead of waiting for You to do Your work.  Thank You Holy Spirit for how evident You are.  May I not grieve You or quench You.  Have Your way in me and help me to be meek and to delight myself in Your abundant peace.